[control]

there rarely comes a time when i seldom have words to describe how i'm feeling, however, today, yes today, is one of those days..

i woke up in a mood, and had to get ready to be at the doctors for 1130am, so really the whole DR thing already had me wrapped tight, pleh..
i hardly find my first day back to work being any better now that i had my innards poked and probed right before going in for 2pm, so yeah, good day? not so much.

i've also spent the last week crying myself to sleep every night, do i find this fun? no.
i don't know what is bothering me, i mean, i know what it is, but its not really pertinent, i dont think.. actually, it's not.. but my feeling of being so alone is an underlying factor and its making this whole thing so much harder..

i don't know what to say or do anymore, and when i do have words, they fall on deaf ears..

so whats the point? exactly, there isnt one.