|fuck|

i started out having such a good fucking day..

then i go shopping, Xmas shopping, hoping it'll set my Christmas mood afloat.. hah.

i get overly aggravated with the overeager shoppers who can't control their carts, let alone their cars or children.. then there is the constant Lay-Away announcements, because everyone and their fucking mother has a lay-away, apparently.. and is waiting in excess of an hour or more for them to find it, so they're announcing names every 5 fucking minutes for these people to produce themselves at the back of the store for their boxes.. lovely.. as the line for lay-away is now about 5 city blocks long and going through one of the aisles i need to fucking shop in.. i hate you, all of you Walmart shoppers.. and all of you fucking lay-away people who are taking up my fucking aisle.. damn you all too hell..

i won't even begin to describe the parking lot fiasco and the fact i had to park in the lawn and garden center area.. that closes at fucking 10pm, so i had to leave thru the supermarket area and walk clear across the parking lot, due south..

then i come home, to do my banking.. and i realize.. Christmas cost far more this year, than last..

and now, now i'm depressed and broke and moody..

i need to go back to work.. even if it kills me.. i dont care if I have to write the cardiologist report myself..
i'm going fucking back..

they want me out for a week after the surgery, but fuck it, who needs recovery time? i've done far worse to my body before.. besides, if my heart cant take it, its an easy way out.. heh

blah.